It has been said

by Alex Hutchins

It is said that with age comes wisdom and while that may be true, it sure does not feel like it is.  At 64, all I can think about is the Beatles song and the following lyrics, “will ya still need me, will ya still love me when I’m 64?”

It is said that one acquires patience with age, but it seems to me that as my years increase there is a direct correlation to a decrease in the levels of my patience.   While there is a distinct difference between patience and tolerance, I find myself possessing neither one of those traits and they are certainly not part of my behavior unless I am dealing with cats.

Cats are similar to children in many ways, yet they are so different from the children to which I have been exposed throughout my life.  While cats appear to be independent, they are fiercely dependent upon us.  For example, while cats may appear to be sleeping during the day, they really are not.  Our three cats are not, they are plotting with each other as to how early they are going to wake us up for their morning treats. While they have on occasion tried to feed their selves, only the Siamese is blessed with the paw dexterity to open cabinet doors.  That ability seems to be limited, at least for now, with cabinets that open up at ground level.

It is said that with age, thoughts will become focused and narrowed, perhaps similar I think to that of a laser beam but instead, it is more of a double barrel shotgun shooting process for me.  I have so many thoughts that sometimes I cannot detect if it is reality or the nature of thought that has me wondering about that which I know nothing or very little and have never, ever wanted to know anything.

It has been said that with age comes maturity but I find the exact opposite is happening to me.  It appears that  my maturity both emotionally and mentally has been apparently deteriorating since I turned 40 which is the same time that I quit smoking; so, the commercials about smoking give the appearances of maturing the youth are true, at least as far as I am concerned.

It has been said that with age comes a deterioration in health and it is with this statement that I am in perfect alignment and agreement.  It now takes me all night to complete what I used to do all night and that is completely upsetting for me.  It seems my heart was the first to go, but not for any of the major reasons that one reads about, but because of my inability to handle stress.  Even though I had DILLIGAFF inscribed on all my coffee cups throughout the years, my internal composition was such that stress just ate away at me on the inside.

My first tournament with stress came during the 60’s and the onset and escalation of the Vietnam war.  Our involvement in that foreign was not respected by Americans and neither were the people who wore the military uniforms which only served to intensify the stress, at least for me.  Throughout my life I have waged an intense, albeit silent and hidden, unpopular war with stress and while many battles were courageously fought and won, the overall war was lost when I had my heart attack.

It has been said that with age comes a reluctant peace-of-mind and with that I am in total agreement.  My on-going pursuit of happiness is there and possibly more so than ever, but the expectations have changed.  Sunsets and sunrises bring me peace along with early morning hot coffee and sitting on the couch, just thinking about nothing particular is very rewarding and something I can do all day long, as long as my wife leaves the house to go to work.