Here's Our Favorite
3) Grover Norquist
Crimes: Born with money and without decency, young Norquist got into politics as a Nixon campaign volunteer, and his filthy mitts have been picking the pockets of the poor and working class ever since. A coauthor of Gingrich’s Contract With America, and integral in designing the Bush tax cuts, Norquist is best known for his anti-tax group Americans for Tax Reform — a member of the Koch-backed American Legislative Exchange Council (which crafts corporate-friendly legislation for state reps to pass off as their own). All but two Republicans in D.C. have signed Norquist’s “Taxpayer Protection Pledge,” which binds them through implied shaming and character assassination to never raise taxes on the rich, thus ensuring a return to a better time in America when children worked in coalmines, got black lung and died hungry without whining about it. Although complicit in the illegal schemes of swine like Oliver North, Jack Abramoff, and Tom Delay, Norquist’s naked duplicity is best summed up with his take on two recent tax issues: He was fine with raising payroll taxes, which would’ve hurt average Americans, but if Obama lets the Bush tax cuts on the wealthy expire, Norquist thinks he should be impeached.
Smoking Gun: “I don’t want to abolish government. I simply want to reduce it to the size where I can drag it into the bathroom and drown it in the bathtub.”
Sentence: Kidnapped by Somali pirates, drowned in a tub of his own tears.
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