8/25/2015

Hearing In Order To See


Our language is filled with all sorts of hidden uses and double meanings that, for the new learner, might be a “tad” difficult to understand at first... I mean, what exactly does “tad” mean... and, for that matter, how far actually is “yonder?”

Years ago, I remember one of my colleagues asking to explain the difference to someone learning the English language, the difference between, to, too, and two... in a sentence, so that the person easily understands which to, two, or too is being used. It is possible, but not readily available from an easy point-of-view.

And, while we put adjectives (for the most part) in front of nouns, verbs, and other adjectives, other languages put them behind which only serves to confuse the issues. And then, what about using the right or appropriate or correct (but according to whom) verb tense when we speak... because, even when we use the incorrect tense our meaning is still conveyed to the listener... so, what is really wrong with that?

Even the well educated, in some instances, have trouble using these two words correctly: effect and affect... without having to think a little. And, good and well is often used incorrectly as well... but, that seems to be less obvious.

But, one of the most important aspects of any language, especially English, I would think is punctuation; although, very little importance other than in formal writing has been given to it... yet, punctuation can be a very powerful tool...

For example... punctuate this sentence: A woman with her man is nothing.

  • Most males would punctuate it this way: A woman, without her man, is nothing.
  • Most females would punctuate it this way: A woman, without her, man is nothing.

We must also take into consideration, tone of the voice, and whether or not eye contact is being made by one or both parties when conversations are taking place... as they too conveys an impression as well as an underlying meaning of the words, phrases, or sentences being used.

It is commonplace, for example, for a politician to be shaking your hand while making a comment to you while looking at another person or the next person in line... perhaps, to be formulating a comment that he wants or needs to make to that person... or, trying to anticipate what that person may be thinking that they want to say to the politician. All-in-all, that type of behavior associated with appropriate use of the English language conveys insincerity and distrust... yet, it is oftentimes used.

So, how does all of this relate to my topic title you may be wondering because hearing is not really speaking the English language now is it?

Well, that is true, but we all know that hearing MUST take place in order for appropriate communications to take place... and, we all know too that appropriate communications in almost every set of circumstances does not always take place in this country and when using the English language...
So, what might be the problem?

The language or us?

Husbands and wives do not often really listen to what the other is saying after the first few months of marriage and it gets worse the longer they remain married.

Those who attend church services on a regular basis, do not always listen to what the minister or clergymen are trying to convey to the audience and the more often they attend the worse it becomes.

Those who must communicate at work to subordinates (including all industries, military, and services) oftentimes do not really say what they mean to say nor do they convey it the way they need to convey it and those listening typically only hear what they want to hear or what their mental paradigm does not filter out for them.

When we invaded Iran years ago, the first American casualty was a result of “Friendly Fire,” which took place because of bad communications between two people. Can you imagine how the person felt who had to explain that one to the family of the deceased?

For me this is fascinating... because it shows me and should the rest of the world, just how difficult language and communications can be... and yet, language and communications are so often taken for granted in the business world as well as in everyday life.

Some of my examples, granted, are in the extreme but presented that way to make my point... and, I do realize that they are not always applicable nor do they always fit the reader's perspectives, experiences, or point-of-views... still, they are nonetheless fairly accurate when applying the idea in a generalized way.

Still, it is interesting (at least for me) because what prompted this article was the fact that when I woke up today and walking into the kitchen for coffee, music was blasting out of the Bose Wave Machine as if we had front row seats at an Eagles Concert... I glared in the direction of my wife who was looking at something on her iPad and when we made eye contact, she turned down the NOISE and said:

I was seeing if the song I liked had made it to number 1 this week...

Well, my first thought was that she was seeing nothing... she was listening to determine... but, having learned from previous and rather painful experiences, I fortunately said nothing but simply proceeded quite innocently and carefully over to the coffee machine to insert a pod... I am allowed only decaf coffee pods these days, but I am still allowed to spoonfuls of Cappuccino Mix...

I sat down on the couch about the same time that this RAP song started playing and I said:

Ya know, I think RAP music is the best music that was every invented by Americans... (pausing as if to be thinking I was...) including JAZZ...

If looks could kill, I would not be writing this article right now nor would I be smiling to myself wondering what the hell I had just gotten into...

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